What's So Funny?
Russell Gayer, author speaker
Redneck Mythology
Did you ever wonder why there were no mythological Gods of Redneck Folklore? Neither did I.
Then I saw this wonderful picture(copyright Lura Helms)and I said to myself, “That explains it!”
I’m sure a bunch of ya’ll are gonna leave comments thanking me for enlightening you on Redneck Mythology. I won’t be able to respond right away as I am on the road this weekend, but don’t worry, I promise to visit your blogs as soon as I return. I appreciate you stopping by.
To read more stories, go to http://madison-woods.com/ click on the Blog tab, and follow the links.
Redneck Mythology
Billy Bob was half goat/half man. We won’t go into his genealogical lineage, but suffice it to say, his kinfolks are regulars on Dr. Phil.
One day, Billy Bob was peeping over the fork of ash tree spying on three beautiful young nymphs skinny dipping. Little did he know that this particular tree was a Venus Fly Ash.
His Mom saw him and cried out, “Billy Bob, pull your head out of that ash!” But the tree snapped shut on Billy’s head.
The moral of the story is; “When you’re doing something naughty; don’t stick your head up an ash.”
21 Comments on “Redneck Mythology”
I'd love to hear from you
Purchase ‘One Idiot Short of a Village’
Purchase ‘The Perils of Heavy Thinking’
What's So Funny? 
hahahahahahaha! Billy Bob shoulda knowed better. I read yours first, Russel and I get to comment first. Love your humor and really enjoyed this piece. http://www.rochelle-wisoff.blogspot.com/2012/08/casualty-of-war.html
LikeLike
Hilarious!! Have a great time away.
LikeLike
This is great redneck Misterology (asa opposed to Mythology). And, you know what they say: "ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if you don't look, your peepers rust."Enjoyed it, Randy
LikeLike
So funny — wonderful little fable, complete with a moral of the story. Very well done!
LikeLike
Funny one! Very clever use of mythology. I'm ashamed I didn't figure out it was a longhorn sheep skull or something like that.http://wrasselings.blogspot.com/2012/08/friday-fictioneers-resolution.html
LikeLike
Oh my gosh, I howled so loud my family ran to my door to see what was going on! This is one of my favorite stories EVER! Well done. Off to wipe my eyes.
LikeLike
Yikes, a redneck fable with a pun a mile wide! Nice job. Here's a virtual pork chop wrapped in bacon with a biscuit and gravy for you.cheers,Loreleihttp://westcoastwriters.blogspot.com/2012/08/fridayfictioneers-fork.html
LikeLike
You never disappoint… this is the way to start the day. Good one Russell.
LikeLike
HaHa! Poor Billy Bob didnt know what he was getting into! Great story to start my day! 🙂
LikeLike
Another witty one. I love the reference to Dr. Phil. I've seen those rednecks on his show…reason I no longer watch. lol. A great way to begin the weekend. Enjoy your trip. I'm #30
LikeLike
Dear Russell,Redneck Mythology is a fitting story for you to depart to your destination on. I think you're on to something here, or just plain on something. Whichever it is I'm sure you're headed for celebrity, either as a fancy pants author or from your picture gracing Post Office walls.Enjoy your time away, read the fine print and know that you ARE funny. (Just not the way you think:)Aloha,Doughttp://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2012/08/17/love-pays-the-butchers-bill/
LikeLike
Wow. How do you come up with this stuff? Always a pleasure to read your work! Here's mine: http://postcardfiction.com/2012/08/17/discovered/
LikeLike
Russell, your clever humor never ceases to amaze me. I'd love to crawl into your brain and see how it comes up with these stories. :)–Janhttp://janmorrill.wordpress.com/2012/08/17/fridayfictioneers-flashfiction-passages/
LikeLike
Ow, I am almost on the floor laughing. Russel, this is a good one. Mine is here: http://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2012/08/17/fridayfictioneers-the-withered-flower/
LikeLike
Russell, you're at your best this week. The story, the pun, the references to Redneck mythology – all perfectly balanced to give us all a belly laugh in the morning – the best medicine!I'm over here: http://elmowrites.wordpress.com/2012/08/17/friday-fictioneers-sin/
LikeLike
Being a lover of corn, I give you high marks for this one. Definitely quotable.
LikeLike
I see a volume of Redneck mythology in your future! I consider myself delightfully enlightened.
LikeLike
great stuff, perhaps as a corollary "look for a tree with a big ash hole"?
LikeLike
Venus Fly Ash. Too darn funny…..Thanks for the education in RN Mythology. I feel edified and ready for the day.Poor Billy Bob Goat.
LikeLike
Haha, redneck mythology! love it!
LikeLike
Problem with your little parable is that there's nothing naughty about spying on naked nymphs skinny dipping. Hell, that's what naked nymphs are for. In my younger days I might even have joined them but, sadly, those days are long gone. Nowadays, even my own wife declines to see my skinny-ness dip anywhere!
LikeLike