What's So Funny?
Russell Gayer, author speaker
Death of an Icon
Did you ever notice how radio stations synchronize their commercials? This morning, while attempting to listen to music, I ran through all six pre-set stations on the car radio only to be bombarded by one ad after another.
The same holds true on television. I can enjoy relief from constipation on one channel, flip to a remedy for diarrhea on another, and complete my tour of the lower track by clicking the remote and landing on an ultra-soft cloud of Quilted Northern bath tissue. After all, no job is truly finished until the paperwork is done.
If you’re new to Friday Flash Fiction, the spokesperson for our product, who squeezes every story to ensure 100 word softness, is Charlotte Whipple Wisoff-Fields. If you’d like to take a stab at this exercise in madness, head over to her blog for step-by-step instructions. To view the FFF Hollywood Squares Authors Block click here.
America lost another super hero this week when the body of Henry Cabot Henhouse III, affectionately known as Super Chicken, was discovered in his Boston penthouse.
Authorities are ruling out fowl play*, but have ordered an autopsy to determine the exact cause of death.
“He was fond of the ‘Super Sauce,’” said archenemy, Salvador Rag Dolly. “He couldn’t chase down a June bug without sticking his beak in that damn martini glass.”
“Henry was a brave bird,” recalled butler/sidekick, Fred. “There were only three things he truly feared, Avian flu, Coccidiosis, and Colonel Sanders.”
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*not a typo, just an ugly pun
47 Comments on “Death of an Icon”
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What's So Funny? 
For a moment I thought big bird from Sesame Street was dead. The amount of explaining I’d have to do to my son would just beggar belief. Good read!!!
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Well, you’re in luck. Super Chicken debuted in 1967. Probably before you were born.
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Yeah. 8 years before my time!!
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ha ha. If I were a chicken, I would be afraid of Colonel Sanders too 🙂 Enjoyed your intro as much as the story.
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Thank you. Don’t forget the paperwork.
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Dear Fred,
The death of an icon is always hard to digest. Finely feathered tail of woe. My condolences to the Henhouse family. I’ve heard that Henry was a good egg.
As always, don’t squeeze the…
Shalom,
Charlotte
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Dear Charlotte,
Henry battled a lot of bad guys in his day. I’m sure it was the repetitive, synchronized commercials that did him in.
Happy Hanukkah,
Fred
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Ain’t that the truth? (All channels synchronised…)
Poor bugger. At least he is remembered with some fondness.
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I wouldn’t say he was finger lickin’ good, but . . .
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Hah!
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Sorry to hear that the sky fell on Chicken Little.
He should have ducked, instead of swanning about.
Sorry turkeyp on about this, Russell, but I goose you’ll have a few bad puns of your own.
I’ll go sling my hook now.
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It was a sad day at the coop, C.E. All the hens are in mourning. He was the cock of the walk.
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Ditto what ansumani said. Actually, ditto what everyone said. Another very clever submission, Russell. And I include the intro.
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Thanks, Alicia. Somehow, Why do I have the feeling I’m only one familiar with the cartoon character Super Chicken (from George of the Jungle Show)?
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Funny cockamamie story. Still smiling.
Tracey
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A what a pretty smile too.
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Gee thanks Russell. Now I’m blushing.
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this is as funny as it gets. well done as usual. 🙂
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Oh, I’m sure it gets funnier somewhere, but thanks for the kind words.
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I can’t think of an original pun – it’s all been said already. Another eggciting contribution from you again, double yolker if you count the intro. Thank you!
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Original puns are like original sins, difficult to conceive. Glad you liked the intro. Synchronized ads are a peeve I like to pet.
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Chooking really… but I’m sure he walks the streets of Memphis together with Elvis.
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Celebrities never really die here in America. They just go into a witness protection program.
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Damn you Russell I have now spent the past hour on YouTube looking at previous episodes of Super Chicken. The cry in the sky is echoing in my ears. Any more episodes and I am getting eggzema.
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Studying to be a crime fighter, eh? Good for you. Fred needs a new partner.
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You get this week’s Gold Medal for fitting the maximum number of corny jokes into a hundred words. Groan.
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Why thank you. I’m practicing for the Corny Joke Olympics.
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Not the death of Super Chicken! I’m not sure I can sleep tonight, Russell. On the bright side, he won’t have to worry about Colonel Sanders any longer. That would be frightful to have that burden. Poor birdy.
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I agree. Pass the mashed potatoes and gravy.
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Colonel Sanders? He’s been dead since you and I were children. Henry is really behind the times. (Gee we both named our protagonists “Henry”; great minds drink alike.) I remember seeing the actual Colonel on Dick Cavett back then, sandwiched between Dr. Benjamin Spock and Robert Klein. He wasn’t that funny.
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The rest of the Fictioneers might say, “Sick minds flip alike,” but everyone knows all comic geniuses have one foot on a banana peel and the other in a bucket of sludge.
I don’t suppose the Colonel gave any indication of the secret herbs & spices? I have a feeling some of those could have gotten him arrested.
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Yes, you got me with the paperwork line. Lol
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It’s true you know. 🙂
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I have to admit I don’t remember Super Chicken either, but it isn’t because I’m too young. One misses so much in life by flicking channels. Are you sure he was found “in” the penthouse and not “in front of it.” He looks like someone pushed him off the balcony. Maybe he fell when trying to escape from Col. Sanders and there was a coverup. It might have been fowl play after all. Hilarious, Russell. 😀 — Suzanne
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When this show was on (mid-60s) you had to walk across the room to change the channels.
You’re right. It could very well be a conspiracy.
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I’ve been behind all week, Russell, but couldn’t wait to see where you’d go with this… that was THE first thing I thought when I saw the photo: Ahhh, Russell will love this! You don’t disappoint! Fowl play indeed! 🙂
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He’d feel honored that you remembered him. A memorial will be held this Friday at your neighborhood KFC.
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Oh my! Admittedly, KFC is an indulgence I love! 😉
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Perfect. Maybe you will get the wishbone.
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Sad story. Shame Super Chicken couldn’t lay off the sauce. Pickled chicken?
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Fighting crime is a stressful job, especially when all the villains sound like Phil Silvers.
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Lovely stuff, although probably made up.
Nasty tautology there – ugly pun!
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There’s a reason they don’t call it Friday Flash Non-Fiction, you know. One commenter did say that the story inspired them to watch several episodes of Super Chicken on YouTube.
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Russell those last two words cracked me up. Very funny. And thanks to one of your commenters I now know that the bird is from Sesame Street. The things you learn on Friday Fictioneers.
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That’s incorrect, Irene. Super Chicken was a cartoon character from the 60s. Which once again goes to show, you can’t believe everything you read on the internet.
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Haha.Cartoons were a side of my education that was sorely lacking.
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Great story–soaring above the clouds on bird puns!
I somehow missed this picture. Please tell me someone did a story about “One Flew Into the Coo Coo’s Nest.”
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