Russell Gayer, author speaker
Poetry, Horror, Psychological Thrillers
Stories From Within
Finding ways to make words sparkle
This is the blog of a woman who is seriously on the edge and I mean right ON the edge…no, not there… just a little bit further… further than that…no, further still…just a tiny bit more… just move slightly to the right a little…no, that’s too much…just move a tad to the left…that’s right, just there…now you’ve moved too far to the left… Damn, what part of the ‘on the edge’ do you not understand? Oh, and her matricidal boy genius, come devil spawn.
Or the three people I guilted into reading this blog, whatever.
Growing older is inevitable. Growing up is optional.
I may make you feel, but I can't make you think.
All the Blogging That's Fit To Print
AS I TOLD THE GIRL THAT I LOST MY VIRGINITY TO, THANKS FOR LAUGHING AT ME HERE TODAY.
A Humor Blog
Stylistically Abusing Language for the Betterment of Mankind
Straight up with a twist– Because life is too short to be subtle!
An author's perspective of mystery and more.
And the worst things. And all that weird stuff in between.
Ha.. love it… I wonder if they had been smoking the grass. Also I have to admit that I feel a bit scared if I will kept on the day of judgement… maybe I need to grow a bit more.
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I don’t think even medical marijuana is legal in Kansas yet, but maybe Doc Tracy will swing by this week and write them a prescription.
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Sorry, no grass for the Bible Belt.
Dr. Tracey
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We’re voting on it this November in Arkansas.
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It-s new to me and kept me amused 😀
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Glad you found it enjoyable.
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I like a girl who plays along with her man’s fantasies. Well, some of them anyway. Good one.
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Me too. I wonder where a guy could find such a girl?
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I believe Junior and Nadine will live happily ever after.
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Well, probably as happy as two grumpy curmudgeons can get.
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I love the story,
But I find the prayer even more endearing.
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Me too.
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Hope springs eternal! We all need a little more optimism! 🙂
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Amen. I wonder if there are any mermaids in that tall grass? Maybe that’s what Junior is hoping to catch.
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It’s important to do what you love, no matter what the obstacles! Well done, made me chuckle.
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I agree. Don’t let a little thing like lack of water keep you from fishing.
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Dear Junior,
Once more your entry and the prayer make my eyes mist. On the other hand your story made me choke. Guess you could catch a grass bass.
Shalom,
G. Guppy Wisoff-Fields
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Dear Gee Golly Guppy,
That is a touching prayer, and one of my all-time favorites. I think of Dad every time I read it.
It’s a good thing Junior isn’t married to you. You CAN swim and would go out there and kick his ass.
Don’t forget to wear a life jacket in that all grass,
Junior
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Love it especially the fisherman’s prayer.
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That is a great prayer.
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That made me laugh. I can see why that fisherman’s prayer was so popular. It is awesome.Good story, and thanks for sharing.
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Thanks for stopping by, Al.
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You’re welcome 🙂
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““I knew you would catch any bass out there.” should this be “wouldn’t” instead of “would”?
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Thanks for catching that, Rich. Corrected now.
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happy to help
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Wonderful – love the kick at the end!
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He would have gotten one if she could swim. 🙂
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I loved the story, it has your usual quirky touch…but the intro really made my heart tremble. Wonderful.
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Aww, what a sweet thing to say. That prayer always brings a lump to my throat.
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I guess Junior ain’t got no ambition…
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He’s sharp as a marble
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Again you made me smile. Thank you. Mike
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We like smiles, Michael. Thanks for dropping by.
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Cute!
Love it!
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I’m just trying to add some spice to life.
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What a fun story. The SO likes to go fishing, and I learned to enjoy it, too.
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Connie won’t go with me, but she’d just want to come home early if she did. We’re better off having separate hobbies.
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Before I started fishing, I just used to sit at the side, enjoying nice summer evenings outside, and most of all: reading, reading, reading without interruption. Mind you, back then there weren’t smartphones around, nor the internet.
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Connie won’t go with him because he goes at the crack of dawn and stay’s until dark thirty. Fishes in lightning storms and won’t take me back to shore. He tell’s me i will have to swim back if i want to go to shore because he might get a bite. Yep this pretty much sums it up.
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I take it Junior’s blonde and rowing though a corn-field. Works still, though. Better than him filling the bathtub half-full of water, putting on his waders, getting in with his fishing pole and fishing into the commode (his concerned wife went to the doctor and he asked her why she hadn’t seen him before — she said she’d been too busy cleaning fish).
You missed an wonderful OWL group, man. But, your named got dropped a few times. How’s the ear doing … I mean, HOW’S THE EAR DOING?
Keep getting healed, Russell, and stick to the fancy restaurants where they have the lobster with the cream gravy, side of biscuits and where you can pick your own fish sticks. 😀
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THE EAR IS MUCH BETTER, KENT. The hearing in my right ear is approx. 70% of the left (by my guess). This Means YoU onLy hAve to tyPe with paRt of the LetTers in All caPs.
I’ll have to try that commode fishing, it sounds pretty effective. Any tips on the best bait to use? Something that floats?
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Something that floats … other than that ball in the tank?
Hmmmm ….. 😀
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Love the fisherman’s prayer, and love the last line of the story!
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Thanks, Jan. The prayer is one of my favorites and the punchline is an old joke, but always funny.
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Loved the last line. I can just picture them!
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A crotchety old couple, aren’t they?
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Oh, this is one of your best! Thanks for a good laugh.
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Whoa, thank you! Glad it tickled your funny bone.
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I can always count on you for a good laugh. Thanks. @sheilamgood at Cow Pasture Chronicles
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Thank you, Sheila. And I can always count on you to drop in and read. I appreciate you. 🙂
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You’re very welcome. It is a pleasure.
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What a great story! Loved the Fisherman’s prayer and your Dad’s cut back response 🙂
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I don’t think there was every anyone who loved to fish more than my dad. He enjoyed this prayer too.
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🙂
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I remember both parts of this, and I enjoyed them over again. The Fisherman’s Prayer is great. Well done, Russell. 🙂 — Suzanne
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Thank you, Suzanne. Glad you enjoyed it the 2nd time around.,
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I would love to see your stories made into comedy skits! You are quite the clever Clarence. To be honest I think I’ve met a few people like Junior and Nadine more than a few times. It’s always a memorable experience.
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Me too. I have some longer one that would make nice little sit-coms.
Thank you so much for stopping by. It’s nice to see your smiling face here. I hope the little guys are behaving themselves.
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The wonderful thing about having new-ish followers (or ones with dizzy blonde heads) is that all of your posts are never-been-opened fresh and new. This is as clever as ever. And that boat looks totally grass-worthy—and I mean any kind of grass! 😉
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ha ha. This couple is made of each other.
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LOL. This was great. Thanks for the morning laugh!
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