The Stakeout

Posted on August 8, 2018 by

46 Comments

Like millions of other Americans, my name is on 342,751 mailing and telemarketer lists. As a member of this elite group, I’m entitled to thousands of “special offers” not available to the general public.

Since turning sixty-two, my options have been upgraded to include end-of-life opportunities. First comes low-cost life insurance, followed by a pre-paid funeral plan, and if I act now, they’ll throw in a reverse mortgage—turning the entire deal into a package they call the “Moment of Mortality Trifecta.”

If you’re new to Friday Flash Fiction, our sponsor who offers a FREE photo prompt each week just for playing along, is Divinity Smurf Wisoff-Fields. If you’d like to participate in this exercise of madness, head over to her blog for step-by-step instructions. To view the ensemble of practicing fic-titioners in the writers in FFF Hollywood Squares Authors Block click here.

 

copyright – Ronda Del Boccio

The stakeout was Blockson’s idea—as was the set-up.

Lowry hated the long hours of watching and waiting, but catching the mime red-handed was his only ticket to reinstatement on the police force.

Blockson had posed as a homeowner and casually mentioned (three times) his rare 1936 invisible guitar to the cable installer, Theo Updyke, a known blabbermouth and cousin to the suspect.

If all went according to plan, it would only be a matter of time until the mime showed up to nibble the irresistible bait.

“There she is,” whispered Blockson. “Let’s move in. Got the invisible handcuffs ready?”

 

Category: humor

46 Comments on “The Stakeout”

  2. We have a similar elite group in Britain too, of which I am a part of. My membership entitles me to receive 157 phone calls per day about PPI and accidents I’ve had in the last month. What joy!
    I am loving the trap for the mime this week! 🙂

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    • It’s been an ongoing saga. Detective Lowry has been after the mime for a couple of years–ever since she stole an invisible box. They’re finally closing in.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  6. I wonder if the mime plays air guitar? I love the mime stories!

    I used to receive many unwanted phone calls. I stopped answering the phone unless it is someone I know. I recently received a threatening letter directing me to pay up or the warranty on my car would expire. The joke is on them; I don’t have a car! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • I don’t know if she plays air guitar herself, but she knows someone who does.

      We gpt a car warranty letter in the mail yesterday. I suppose if you fish long enough for suckers you’ll find one or two who’ll take the bait.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  7. Dear Mick “Reverse Mortgage” Dagger,

    Wait a couple of years and they’ll be after you to choose your Medicare Part B. I can’t tell you how many letters and phone calls I’ve gotten to remind me how old I am.
    I have it on good authority that the mime plays a magnificent invisible violin. And she says to tell Detective Lowry good luck. She likes to play mime games.

    Shalom,

    Divinity Smurf W(T)F

    Liked by 5 people

    Reply

    • Dear Divinity Smurf W(T)F,

      Yes, I’m constantly reminded that I’m not a pup any more. My agent insists I wear one of those Lifeline push-button things around my neck in case I fall on stage and can’t get back up.

      Invisible violin? I’m just glad it’s not invisible banjo. THAT would be spooky!

      Best of luck with Part B.
      Mick “Reverse Mortgage” Dagger

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

      • Uncle Sam has taken care of Part B. Thank you, Jan, for your service. 😉 Old? I haven’t come out of childhood yet. Feh on second childhood!

        Shalom,

        Divinity Smurf W(T)F

        Liked by 1 person

  8. You mix real procedure with imaginary matters in a very persuasive manner. I can’t wait to hear how the mime outwits Lowry and Blockhead as they move in!

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  11. That poor mime gets blamed for everything!

    My son-in-law told me about Nomorobo.com which has eliminated many, many calls that come through in spite of our being on a don’t-call list. It’s nice. Once you set it up, if your phone rings once and stops, you know it was a robot phone marketer.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • Sorry to hear that, Eric. Perhaps Lowry & Blockson can recover it along with the dozens of other invisible items this little mime has collected. Then, all you’ll have to do is come down to the station and identify which one is yours.

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

      • You’ll have to find those invisible articles to put the white gloved finger on her. Don’t fret, Eric, invisible strings are hard to find and the guitars are difficult to tune.

        Like

      • Oh, that’s great new. I’ll have a “look.” I can recognize it immediately. It’s invisible.

        Like

  14. Oh wow – that is a lot of lists to be on!
    Whew and who knows what lists you are on that you are not even aware of!
    And enjoyed the fiction – love the name blockson

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  20. Oh no, are we nearing the end of the road for the mime? I imagine she might have a key for those handcuffs in a secret pocket though.

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