Back in days before “Cougar” meant something other than a large cat, The Rolling Stones recorded a song entitled, “The Spider and the Fly.” I’ve been humming it ever since I saw the prompt. I expect three or four Fictioneers to take that route, and I look forward to reading their entries. Instead, I chose an angle our more “mature” readers could relate to. The third paragraph is an actual line from the movie.
This week’s inspirational photo is courtesy of my good friend, Rochelle Wisoff-Fields.
To read more stories, go to http://madison-woods.com/ click on the Blog tab, and follow the links.
How I Learned to Stop Worrying . . . .
“Good morning, Mrs. Smith. How are you today?”
“Just fine, Doctor Strangelove. Do you have my husband’s test results?”
“Based on the findings of the report, my conclusion was that this idea was not a practical deterrent for reasons which at this moment must be all too obvious.”
“Could you break that down in layman terms?”
“Your husband has a growth over his hypothalamus. Here’s a picture of a healthy brain.”
“And here is the scan of your husband’s blockage”
“What does the hypothalamus control?”
“His libido or sex drive.”
“Good. It’s nothing that’ll keep him from mowing the lawn.”
Poetry, Horror, Psychological Thrillers
Stories From Within
Finding ways to make words sparkle
This is the blog of a woman who is seriously on the edge and I mean right ON the edge…no, not there… just a little bit further… further than that…no, further still…just a tiny bit more… just move slightly to the right a little…no, that’s too much…just move a tad to the left…that’s right, just there…now you’ve moved too far to the left… Damn, what part of the ‘on the edge’ do you not understand? Oh, and her matricidal boy genius, come devil spawn.
Or the three people I guilted into reading this blog, whatever.
Growing older is inevitable. Growing up is optional.
I may make you feel, but I can't make you think.
All the Blogging That's Fit To Print
AS I TOLD THE GIRL THAT I LOST MY VIRGINITY TO, THANKS FOR LAUGHING AT ME HERE TODAY.
A Humor Blog
Stylistically Abusing Language for the Betterment of Mankind
Straight up with a twist– Because life is too short to be subtle!
An author's perspective of mystery and more.
And the worst things. And all that weird stuff in between.
OMG!!!! Let me be the first to say hahahahahahahahahahahaha! Russell you are so wrong. And that’s a compliment, my friend.
So . . . it will keep him from mowing the lawn?
No I think he can mow the lawn. LOL. You yourself…are just wrong…off-kilter, skewed…looney toons…which is why you’re so funny. Is that clearer?
I’ll take that as a compliment. Writing humor is not hard – until someone hands you a photo prompt.
Everyone has their priorities. 🙂 At least he wasn’t riding a bomb!! Too funny. Just what I needed at this point in my day.
Now, now! Might as well use him for entertainment as well as chores… Russell, you have me grinning. Good one!
Ha! Ha! Excellent!
this is very funny 🙂 good one!
Hearty chuckle here…thanks.
Hahahahahaha….its interesting…hilarious and interesting!
in addition to mowing lawns, I think he could also be rented out part time (nocturnally) as an organic flying insect catcher. Good story.
I also wanted to comment on the low sex drive theme but I had to mow my lawn first or else the wife, well, you know…
This story was no bomb. Wait, make that “This story was the bomb.”
And because of it, this is how I learned to love the bomb!!!!!
Wow. I just felt the earth move slightly. Now let’s talk about sex. Oooh. Randy
priceless! Loved it 🙂
So… nothing serious then. It could have been so much worse. Nice one Russell, still grinning.
You making up for last week? (Big time! this was superb and absolutely loony) Now, go mow the lawn.
I really need to watch that movie, don’t I? But in the meantime, more great humour from the master, Russell. Thanks for making me laugh on a challenging day.
It’s not my favorite Peter Sellers movie, but George C. Scott was great in Dr. Strangelove. “A Shot in the Dark” is whole lot funnier.
Hysterical and super witty/clever/creative! Great work Russell — thoroughly enjoyed 😉 RL
He should get some Cialis, maybe a double dose, and then he and his wife should do one of those playful commercials on the newly mown lawn. Just a thought. Ron
Can I just say the pictures make the story? Well, that and the story…
This sounds a little like my couple 30 years down the road.
Great take on the pic. Why do spider webs make people think of human brains?
Hahaha! Some women have their priorities out of order 😉 Funny funny, Russell.
And he’ll never even know what he’s missing… funny indeed, and kudos on the title.
True – and if you don’t know – you don’t miss it.
i know there is a song but i’ve never heard it. as for smith, poor guy.
laughing — after he puts the lawnmower away, you now have to touch his arm and say, you were really good dear.