What's So Funny?
Russell Gayer, author speaker
Circus Escapee
The topic of today’s intro is Pranks. Here’s one a WWII vet shared with me, circa1930’s.
A thirteen-year-old boy named Bert was helping his neighbor, Alvin, build a barn. There was no rural electricity and boards had to be sawn by hand. Alvin cut a board too short. “Hey, Bert, run over to Charlie’s farm and ask him if we can borrow his ‘board-stretcher.’” It was a half-mile walk and when Bert asked Charlie about the stretcher, he feigned looking for them, then said, “I must’ve loaned the to Virgil.” Bert took off for Virgil’s house. It took three stops and several miles afoot before Bert realized he’d been pranked.
Now it’s your turn. Tell us about a prank you’ve been a part of in the comments.
If this is your first Friday Flash Fiction, our hostess, who was expelled twice from Ringling Bros. Clown College,, is Meriem Menant Wisoff-Fields. If you’d like to participate in this exercise in madness, head over to her blog for step-by-step instructions. To view the FFF Hollywood Squares Authors Block click here.
Detective Lowry watched the video several times. The perp, who was barely five-feet tall, tip-toed across the backyard. On the return trip, the upper body was leaning back with upturned hands, as if carrying something in empty arms.
“It looks like a midget,” Harvey said. “Do you think this one ran away from the circus?”
“It’s a mime,” Lowry said with disgust. “They all dress alike. Horizontal-striped shirt, beret, and white face paint. Most are harmless, but creepy in their own way.”
“He acts as if he’s carrying something heavy, but there’s nothing there.”
“Maybe we just can’t see it.”
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________
The crime you just witnessed happened in Belton, Missouri. Both men mistook the mime to be male, but we know better–don’t we. 🙂
Ozark Hollow Press will be publishing the sordid tale in its entirety later this year. Stay tuned for details.
33 Comments on “Circus Escapee”
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What's So Funny? 
“Maybe we just can’t see it” is, I grant you, open minded, but perhaps not what you want to hear from an investigator
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True, but the item stolen was an invisible box.
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Russell! How wonderful to find you here! Of course we know who is carrying what…
As for pranks – I hate being pranked so I don’t prank others. My late husband did one once and never tried again. He pulled the bed away from it’s spot when I went to the bathroom. When I went to jump onto it, I landed on my behind. He was killing himself laughing until he saw that nope…
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(holdiing in a snicker.) Some pranks can be mean and cause physical pain. Bad. Bad Prank.
Ones that are the most fun are the practical joke variety. When Connie worked at a lumberyard, one of their vendors had her looking for a left-handed shovel. 🙂
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I was not pleased.
And I don’t play jokes on peeps coz I hate being the recipient!
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Mimes must have many imaginary friends. Nice story.
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I asked one. But she never said a word.
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Was she carrying a missing Fictioneer?
Do I get a prize?
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Perhaps she was.
I’ll send you a set of board stretchers.
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Oooh, a mystery indeed, what (or who) is she carrying? And do we approve?!
I’m not a big fan of pranks, but I’ve subjected the kids to a few harmless “water running down the stairs” and “Brown Es” type ones over the years. Recently, they were directed into the oven for an Apple Pi!
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You’ll have to wait for the book to find out what the mime is carrying.
When I was about 5, my brother (age 22) would tell me there was a candy bar in his car that I could have. Then, when I returned with a sad, disgusted look on my face, he’d fall over laughing.
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Hello you look so familiar how are you doing and where are you from ?
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LOL!
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Hey, Morgaine. You forgot to tell me about a prank you were involved in.
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Believe it or not, I have never done a prank!
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Dear Harvey Wingnut,
One never knows what a mime carries in her invisible box. 😉
As for pranks…I’ve pulled a few but my favorite was one I pulled on a coworker when I was a cake decorator in a grocery store. We had a grocery manager who was fond of sneaking up on unsuspecting coworkers and scaring the you-knw-what out of them. One evening he did it once too often. Dan drove an old bomb of a car. So on my break I took a bag of royal blue icing and squirted it under his door handle.
The next day it had gone around the store that I got him. His assistant manager told me that Dan had ruined his white shirt wiping the icing on it. He couldn’t tell in the dark what it was. Lonnie proceded to tell me that I was going to be in big trouble. About that time our store director came up to us and asked, “Did you really squirt blue icing under Nagel’s door handle.” I replied yes to which the store director said, “Good job!”
Now aren’t you glad you asked? Gosh I just wrote what could be my next flash non-fiction. Booyah!
Shalom,
Mereim Menant W(T)F
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Dear M ‘n M W(T)F,
People used to pull a similar prank in the printing trade. The presses had black handwheels the operator would walk the cylinders around by hand. The pranksters would put a glob of black or reflex blue ink on the backside when you weren’t looking. You’d wind up getting all over your hands, sometimes your nose if you scratched there. Oil base ink does not come off easily. We wore aprons and they would gently tie knots in the strings when you had your back turned.
Sometimes work interfered with our pranks, but not for too long.
Happy pranking,
Harvey Wingnut
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I was trying to imagine what the board stretcher looked like – and that was a fun opening.
Also, the fiction for the fairgrounds prompt was fun and I do think the mime had an invisible box!
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Having never seen a board stretcher, I’m not much help.
You are correct about the mime, though.
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🙄
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They should have helped the mime carrying the thing, clearly it was too heavy for her.
I don’t usually do pranks. Two co-conspirators (whom I help running a hashtag game over on Mastodon) and I wanted to make an April Fools joke as a prompt last April 1st. It backfired and resulted in hurt feelings and name-calling. We have another mean idea for this April, but probably won’t run it because no one else but us will find it funny.
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A teenage boy offers to help carry it a couple chapters later in the story.
Yes, pranks can be hazardous. Choose yours carefully.
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was he carrying something? i suppose the mime is just exercising his right to silence.
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Yes, she was carrying something. And, yes, she never speaks when wearing her makeup and costume.
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First: I’ve never been pranked. Perhaps a good thing? Nor have I pranked. Dang, maybe I just don’t know how it’s done. I like the idea of an invisible box filled with something heavy. How the heck does that even happen?
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Poor Lish, no practical jokes? That’ too bad. Oh well, you’re young. There’s still time.
The book explains all those unanswered questions. Hopefully, it will be out in time for Christmas.
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Russell, I actually have been pranked now that I think of it, but I guess it didn’t make too big an impression.
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Hello you look so familiar how are you doing and where are you from ?
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I think we just can’t see it. I’ve never been pranked, only tormented with bugs in my shoes and more by my brothers. 🙂
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A brother putting bugs in your shoes qualifies as a prank. My wife’s brother wrapped up bird poop and told his little sisters it was candy. 🙂
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What fun. You were most definitely missed here.
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Surreal!
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Ah, these mime artists (That would sound better in French, non?)
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