Dems Split on Cup Issue

Arkansas Delegate
Arkansas Delegate modeling protective cup

Philadelphia: – While the national news media is blathering about the resignation of Democratic Party Chair Debbie Wassermann Schultz, the issue causing the most division within the party is how to wear the Political Protective Cup.

The Sanders supporters insist the cup should be worn over the lower extremities to provide protection against Republican low-ball tactics, while those in the Clinton camp recommend covering the right ear to guard against the fear & hate propaganda directed at Democrats.

The one thing both factions agree upon however, is that Donald Trump should wear his cup firmly over his mouth. According to one delegate, the only problem seems to be finding a cup large enough to cover such an orifice.


*Our Arkansas correspondent is covering the convention this week from the safety and comfort of his easy chair. If you wish to contact him, you may do so by email at russellwrites2@gmail.com.

 

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11 thoughts on “Dems Split on Cup Issue

    1. Dear Despondent,
      These are uncomfortable times. We cannot afford to let our guard down. Our nation, and our children’s future depend upon it.

      It’s time to strap up and get going.
      Correspondent Gayer

    1. For the most part, he looks like he’s been weaned on a sour pickle. I think a pacifier is great idea. Perhaps one of those bonnets like Baby Huey wore would be complete the look as well.

  1. The main post was hilarious and the comments added to it. You’re a wise person, Russell. A comfortable chair is the best place to report from. It’s one of the few safe places in the country these days–let’s hope. 😀 — Suzanne

    1. Thanks, Lorna. The cup provides plenty of space for extra socks and a toaster oven if I go on a trip. Right now, the Russians are trying to decode the cryptic message inside this blog and pass it on to Trump. I expect his henchmen will be showing up at any momentto break my oversized fingers.

  2. […] Unfortunately, Tympanoplasty is a twelve-thousand dollar word for a medical procedure in which they pretty much detach your ear from the side of your head, graft a patch of tissue over your eardrum, and sew your ear back on. Afterwards, you get to wear a lovely cup, which I modeled for in  this photo. […]

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