What's So Funny?
Russell Gayer, author speaker
Category: humor
The Doctor Is In
Recently, I visited a dermatologist for a scab atop my left ear. He told me it was an age spot—which had to be a lie. At 68, I’m much too young for those. He took a biopsy of a different spot on my ear which came… Continue Reading “The Doctor Is In”
A Crime Against Nature
A few years ago, someone gave me a book entitled, Keep Your Brain Alive. I took this to mean the anonymous donor of this book wanted to preserve my brain in a glass jar for use in a future transplant—ala Dr. Frankenstein. The book contains… Continue Reading “A Crime Against Nature”
Wednesday Watchers
For Christmas, my daughter bought me a wonderful book entitled, Insults Every Man Should Know. For a man who was once told he was “sharp as a marble,” I’ve found this little tome extremely handy. Here are a few of my favorites: “You look… Continue Reading “Wednesday Watchers”
Who Names Prescription Drugs?
Have you ever wondered how prescription drugs get their names? Me neither, but now that you’ve asked, I’ll tell you. Big Pharma would have you believe the names are based on the molecular structure of the drug. This is only an inside joke to… Continue Reading “Who Names Prescription Drugs?”
High Falutin Eats
In all my years, I’ve never seen a deer cross the highway anywhere near a Deer X-ing sign. Some might argue that deer can’t read, but I think they’re just belligerent jaywalkers. To drive home the message, the highway department should paint two lines… Continue Reading “High Falutin Eats”
The Rong Bros.
At our spring Ozarks Writers League conference, Duke Pennell noticed that some thoughtful soul had stocked the men’s bathroom with a can of air freshener aptly named Man-go. The label was somewhat worn from multiple uses, but you could still make out the name… Continue Reading “The Rong Bros.”
Communion
Yesterday I chewed the mailman out for leaving more of those darned Home Improvement magazines in our mailbox. All they do is cause trouble. Connie can spend hours studying the photos and flagging items like child selecting presents from a Christmas catalog. Then she’ll point… Continue Reading “Communion”
Fantasy Baseball
This week, I’ve been thinking about urban legends. You know, that modern genre of folklore where false claims or fictitious tales are circulated as true. One of my dad’s favorites regarded the pulling of a baby tooth. “If you don’t stick your tongue in the… Continue Reading “Fantasy Baseball”
Boot Camp
This week, we got a big snow—big by Arkansas standards, anyway—and everybody and their cousins posted pictures of it on Facebook. All except my cousin Jerry, that is. If ya called him, he’d say the power was out for a couple of days. But… Continue Reading “Boot Camp”
Day of Dysentery
A few days ago, I had a thought, which may surprise those of you who know me well. I was writing my autobiography and came to the scene where Connie and I applied for a marriage license. It occurred to me that this was the only… Continue Reading “Day of Dysentery”
Purchase ‘One Idiot Short of a Village’
Purchase ‘The Perils of Heavy Thinking’
What's So Funny? 