What's So Funny?
Russell Gayer, author speaker
OY! Frankfurters
Connie and I just returned from visiting a friend in Kentucky. While there, we took one of their famous Bourbon Tours (hiccup). The scent of mash in the tanks brought back memories of my dad making moonshine. The primary difference being that they let theirs age in charred oak barrels—Dad didn’t have the patience for that.
We also toured a Shaker village and Connie bought some brooms to give as gifts. They’re too nice (and expensive) to use for sweeping, so I suppose the lucky recipients will reserve them for midnight rides.
If you’re new to Friday Flash Fiction, the Superheroine of 100-word stories who posts our photo prompt each week is Hazel Brunhild Wisoff-Fields. If you’d like to participate in this exercise in madness, head over to her blog for step-by-step instructions. To view the FFF Hollywood Squares Authors Block click here.
“Ladies and gentlemen, this is our final stop on Superhero Row, the home and laboratory of Shalom Shlacker and his portly sidekick, Bagel Boy.”
The guide pointed to the roll-up door. “This is the garage for the Deli Wagon, a portable kitchen filled with high-tech utensils created to protect kosher foods from becoming cross-contaminated by non-kosher contact.
“In the movie, OY! Frankfurters, Shlacker’s nemesis, the evil Mr. Shekel/Dr. Chyde, contaminates a hot dog factory, kidnaps Bagel Boy, and tortures him with pickled pork feet. At the last second, Shlacker comes to the rescue and handcuffs Chyde with a hard pretzel.”
35 Comments on “OY! Frankfurters”
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What's So Funny? 
Dear Bagel Boy,
Oy oy oy. I’m doing a Hebrew hora with joy to see I have a name this week. I can just imagine you on the bourbon tour with your cherry-red cheeks contrasting the silver hair. Quite the statement against your blue suit with a star of David on your chest and red terrycloth cape flying out behind you. Might I offer you a Hebrew National dog or two? They answer to a higher power you know. 😉
Shalom,
Hazel Brunhide W(T)F
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Dear Hazel Brunhild W(T)F,
I love the visual image of me in the blue suit (let’s hope it’s not skin tight) with the star and cape. I do love the Hebrew National dogs. Put a little kraut and mustard on there and I’m good to go. I bet they’d be good on bagels too.
Watch for drones on your next ride,
Bagel Boy
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Sheckel and Chyde! Genius!
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Just imagine poor Bagel Boy’s reaction to the pickled pork feet. What horror!
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Entertaining take on the prompt, Russell. The inventor in me wonders whether the Deli Wagon could be modified to handle Vegan/non-Vegan foods. There’s a fortune to be made there, somewhere!
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I’m sure it could, Penny. Along with gluten free offerings, it is certain to be a big hit.
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Loved the Sheckel and Chyde. Save a broom for me, I might take a ride out later.
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Will do, Sandra. I think one of them is equipped with an eight-cylinder engine.
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Wonderful entertainment 🙂 We have lots of serious stories this week, so the silliness and fun in yours was a nice change of pace.
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Thank you, Linda. Silliness is what we’re here for.
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You’re a regular mensch, Russell! Very entertaining mishegas!
BTW, I need a new broom 🙂
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What? Are you planning to fly across the water? I’ve never seen a mermaid on a broom. It would be quite a sight.
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It’s nice to see a little Borscht Beltish humor, instead of always so to.be.taken.seriously. This was so neat
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Thank you, Larry. I thought we needed some Jewish super heroes for a change.
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Is this the latest Marvel movie? I can’t keep up these days 😉
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I think so. They try really hard to cover all the bases so that every race, religion, and ethnic group feels a connection to the superhero world.
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RLS is fair birling in his grave.
As for Ms Lee:
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What a lively song. Obviously, good broom-riding music.
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Oh I love this … such a fun thing…. but I’m concerned about what your wife’s friends true occupation if they plan for midnight riding.
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From what I understand, it’s not a full-time job. She just considers it “moonlighting.”
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At last, a bit of light relief. Pretzel handcuffs indeed! Excellent Russell.
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Thanks, Keith. I apologize for not getting over and reading yours. Connie’s has me doing long days on a kitchen remodel project.
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How dare she? !!
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it’s funny as it gets. truly enjoyed it. 🙂
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That’s a mighty high compliment. I thank you, sir.
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Nice read
Strange
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Thank you for taking the time to read it. 🙂
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Quite a home and laboratory Shalom Shlacker has.
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Yes, he and Bagel Boy have quite a lair.
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I like the superhero take on this and the grand tour of the movie locations.
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Thank you, James. I think the world needs more Jewish superheros.
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For some reason, I read that Bagel Boy was TICKLED by pickled pork feet… perhaps that WAS the way he was tortured. 😉
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Oh, the horror!!! It would be bad enough to be forced to eat them, but TICKLED, that’s cruel and inhumane.
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haha! Glad you enjoyed your trip to Kentucky. The longer I live here the more I understand why bourbon (or alcohol in general) is so important. Grr…
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Yes, I understand the need for alcohol, especially with some of the politicians we have. Here in Arkansas micro-breweries are the thing. It seems like there’s one on every corner and they now call it the Ale Trail.
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