What's So Funny?
Russell Gayer, author speaker
Dense Frog Warning
Whatever happened to TV show theme songs and jingles for products? I can still recall most of the lyrics to Gilligan’s Island and Texaco Gasoline (you can’t trust your car to the man who wears the star). It gives me an ear worm just thinking about those songs.
Now, it’s your turn. Give me a few lyrics in the comments for a current TV show or product, such as The Bachelor or Georgie & Mandy’s First Marriage (no drug ads please).
If you’re new to Friday Flash Fiction, our hostess, whose singing makes goosebumps rise on the back of Godzilla’s neck, is Ethyl Mermaid Wisoff-Fields. If you’d like to participate in this exercise in madness, head over to her blog for step-by-step instructions. To view the FFF Hollywood Squares Authors Block click here.
Thousands of frogs lived in a beautiful pond surrounded by trees. The adults crouched on lily pads feasting on insects while their young took turns hopping over each other’s backs.
Due to a ban on family planning, the population exploded and food-insecurity became an issue . A hateful old frog, renowned for his stubbornness and lack of brain power, conned the majority into believing he had a solution.
“I’ll make the pond great again,” he croaked. He offered a former enemy a thousand healthy young frogs in exchange for fifty mosquitos.
His trade partner opened a restaurant.
All-you-can-eat frog legs, 200 rubles.
22 Comments on “Dense Frog Warning”
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What's So Funny? 
Efficiency at its finest. Tracey
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Thanks, Tracey,
I was hoping you’d write a theme song for Chicago Med or General Hospital. 🙂
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I would have but the baritone was eaten before the first chorus.
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Hmm. These frogs sound like two morons who are always in the news lately.
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It’s very dense between that frog’s ears, if frogs have ears, that is.
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Dear Michigan J. Frogmire,
“Come and listen to my story bout a man named Jed…” Yeah, I had to go there. I have to ask, was the hateful old frog orange? I’m asking for a friend. I guess the Jardiance theme song need not apply. But you did bring to mind a plethora of theme songs I remember from childhood. Although it had no lyrics I am hearing strains of the Twilight Zone theme song.
Shalom and happy glug. I’ll miss you this weekend. Hope you have a ribbiting time.
Ethyl Mermaid W(T)F
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Oh, Ethyl, you can do better than that. You Jews are famous for writing show tunes. Just scribble a quick jingle for Charmin or Preparation H.
I will definitely miss you Saturday. Since you won’t be there to object, I’ll nominate you for some office or recommend you as judge of a nasal groaning contest.You can thank me for it later.
Best wishes,
Michigan J. Frogmire
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Okay (sigh) I’ll start with the lyrics and you can write the next one.
TV show “Farmer Takes a Wife”
I’m lookin’ for a woman who ain’t afraid of work
Who’ll milk the cows, slop the hogs, and look good in a skirt
Whose favorite color is John Deere green
She’ll wash my socks and mend my jeans
Can cook like Mom and wants eight kids
And never fails to tell me how good I am in bed
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i’m afraid the supply of frog legs will run out soon. what happens now? 🙂
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Trade more frogs for Tse Tse flies.
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This gives a sinking feeling…
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I can’t imagine who you might be thinking of
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plop flop fizz fizz o what an imbecile he is
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Ha! Love it. 🙂
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🙂
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Oh no!
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Take you choice, frog legs or mosquitos. yum!
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Oh, what a great deal that is. The best deal. The one and only deal. Why do these frog legs taste so bitter?
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Russians don’t mind bitter frog legs. They taste better than mosquitos
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Nationwide, they’re not on your side…..
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I didn’t know there were words to Jeopardy, but heard this once: I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know, so don’t you ask me cuz I don’t know. I don’t know …
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Good one, Lori. Those lyrics fit quite nicely. I wonder what we could come up with for Wheel of Fortune?
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