Affordable Lamp Care

As a general rule, I stay away from political topics. It’s too easy.  But many of America’s great humorists including Will Rogers, Mark Twain, and others made a handsome living reporting the steady stream of insanity coming out of Washington. Who am I to argue with that formula for success?

If you’re new to Friday Flash Fiction, the Speaker of the House of Bloggers is the honorable Denise “Roach” Wisoff-Fields.  If you’d like to participate in this exercise in madness, head over to her blog for step-by-step instructions. To view the FFF  Hollywood Squares Authors Block click here.

copyright Dawn M. Miller
copyright Dawn M. Miller

Millicent had some health issues. Mrs. Kudzu at the second-hand store tried to get Millicent covered under the store’s insurance, but the agent just shook his head and said, “Sorry, too many pre-existing conditions.”

Unable to afford care, her health continued to decline. No one seemed interested in her. She was pushed aside. Alone, with no hope for the future.

Then President Aladdin rolled out the Affordable Lamp Care program. Now Millicent, and millions like her, could have their wiring repaired, plug-ins replaced, and sockets stabilized.

Millicent smiled. Under the President’s program, she could even keep her current lamp shade.


43 thoughts on “Affordable Lamp Care

  1. My dear departed Mama would say, “He’s gone from the sublime to the cor blimey”
    I say, his imagination has gone into warp drive and he’s produced another stellar piece 😀


      1. LOL it’s probably not covered, but it means “well blow me down,” or “well if that ain’t marvellous, I’ll eat my hat.”
        or something similar. It’s Cockney.


  2. If the picture above is true to life, there are a lot of lamps in the waiting room hoping to take advantage of benefits under the Affordable Lamp Care program. At first glance, It looks like there’s been a plague of disappearing bulbs.


  3. Dear Dr. Al,

    I’d say Millicent was wired. Perhaps she should go into electrical rehab? Once more you’ve exposed the inner workings of the political mother board and given us an outlet. (If this makes any sense to you I’m worried.) Made me smile.

    BTW, the good old high school nickname was a bit of a double entendre. I’m sure I don’t need to spell it out for you. 😉




    1. Dear Roach,
      Is this your blacklight that needs Rehab? That’s an excellent idea. I think the plan only covers 90 in such a facility, but you can visit as often as you’d like. It’ll be just like old times. – Dr. Al


  4. Very amusing story, I enjoyed it! I was a bit worried when you spoke of a political theme, but fortunately I’ve heard of the health care wranglings in the US at the moment so I got that as well 🙂


  5. Very RIGHT-ON. Love it! … Wonder what her new lamp shade will look like? Bet it will not cover what her current lamp shade covers, ha.

    Mike (Nan’s husband)


  6. Hi Russell,
    The president’s program was well intended, but unfortunately Milllicent died while trying to get on to the website, because the internet was blocked by a bunch of silly writers posting short pieces. Nice of you to promote Helena’s book. Ron


  7. Lovely illuminated project…Like your idea of political satire…wish we could find more about President Aladdin’s about Affordable Lamp Care program. Thanks for shedding some light on the subject!


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