The Boomer Brothers
The story is a tale of redemption for retired Human Resources Manager Flake Boomer (Perry Block) and his brother Deadwoody (Russell Gayer).
After being thrown out of the senior center for cheating at Bingo, Flake is irritated at being picked up by brother Deadwoody in the Boomermobile, a red and white AMC Pacer, instead of the Plymouth Valiant the brothers used to own.
The brothers visit their childhood haunt, a Jewish delicatessen they grew up stealing bagels from, only to learn it will close unless it pays $1,252.19 to an Amish dairy who is holding their kosher cream cheese hostage until the deli’s delinquent bill is paid.
After visiting a Roman Catholic priest, where Flake confessed to being aroused by his fourth-grade science teacher’s unshaved legs, Deadwoody has an epiphany without even knowing what one is.
The pair decides they must prevent the deli from closing as restitution for all the bagels they stole as children. To do so, they enlist the help of The Hartford adman, “Mad Matt” McCoy and organize a rummage sale to earn the $1,252.19.
“Mad Matt” – Rummage Sale Barker
Along the way, they are targeted by a horny male dog, Frank & Mike from American Pickers, and a Cajun Polka band—all while being relentlessly pursued by a band of elderly women wearing yoga pants.
In the end, the brother’s quest falls short by $916.42, but the Amish agree to release the cream cheese if Flake and Deadwoody promise to stop singing Jewish folks songs outside their dairy.
Horror, Psychological Thrillers, Flash Fiction, and Poetry
Stories From Within
Finding ways to make words sparkle
This is the blog of a woman who is seriously on the edge and I mean right ON the edge…no, not there… just a little bit further… further than that…no, further still…just a tiny bit more… just move slightly to the right a little…no, that’s too much…just move a tad to the left…that’s right, just there…now you’ve moved too far to the left… Damn, what part of the ‘on the edge’ do you not understand? Oh, and her matricidal boy genius, come devil spawn.
Or the three people I guilted into reading this blog, whatever.
Growing older is inevitable. Growing up is optional.
Confessions of a Delusional Maniac
I may make you feel, but I can't make you think.
All the Blogging That's Fit To Print
AS I TOLD THE GIRL THAT I LOST MY VIRGINITY TO, THANKS FOR LAUGHING AT ME HERE TODAY.
I don't write, I touch without touching.
A Humor Blog
Stylistically Abusing Language for the Betterment of Mankind
Straight up with a twist– Because life is too short to be subtle!
An author's perspective of mystery and more.
And the worst things. And all that weird stuff in between.