What's So Funny?
Russell Gayer, author speaker
The Boomer Brothers
The Boomer Brothers
The story is a tale of redemption for retired Human Resources Manager Flake Boomer (Perry Block) and his brother Deadwoody (Russell Gayer).
After being thrown out of the senior center for cheating at Bingo, Flake is irritated at being picked up by brother Deadwoody in the Boomermobile, a red and white AMC Pacer, instead of the Plymouth Valiant the brothers used to own.
The Boomermobile
The brothers visit their childhood haunt, a Jewish delicatessen they grew up stealing bagels from, only to learn it will close unless it pays $1,252.19 to an Amish dairy who is holding their kosher cream cheese hostage until the deli’s delinquent bill is paid.
After visiting a Roman Catholic priest, where Flake confessed to being aroused by his fourth-grade science teacher’s unshaved legs, Deadwoody has an epiphany without even knowing what one is.
The pair decides they must prevent the deli from closing as restitution for all the bagels they stole as children. To do so, they enlist the help of The Hartford adman, “Mad Matt” McCoy and organize a rummage sale to earn the $1,252.19.
“Mad Matt” – Rummage Sale Barker
Along the way, they are targeted by a horny male dog, Frank & Mike from American Pickers, and a Cajun Polka band—all while being relentlessly pursued by a band of elderly women wearing yoga pants.
In the end, the brother’s quest falls short by $916.42, but the Amish agree to release the cream cheese if Flake and Deadwoody promise to stop singing Jewish folks songs outside their dairy.
22 Comments on “The Boomer Brothers”
Leave a Reply to rochellewisoff Cancel reply
Purchase ‘One Idiot Short of a Village’
Purchase ‘The Perils of Heavy Thinking’
What's So Funny? 
Yes, this little tale is accurate in every respect except for the picture of Russell and me above which was posed for by professional actors since we both don’t really look our ages. This is a current photo of me https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=103667029678242&set=pb.100001048371960.-2207520000.1452555834.&type=3&size=425%2C720
and here’s one of Russell
Enjoy, everyone!
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Tried to post a comment with pictures, doesn’t look like it “took.” Will try again in a bit without pictures.
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All is well that ends well.
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We kept looking for you at the rummage sale, Dawn. Where were you?
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I had to work.
I miss all the good stuff!
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Hilarious, Russell. Looks like the Boomer Bros. were successful in their quest after all. They remind me of a couple of other guys who had similar problems. When a couple of guys like you and Perry get together we never know what the outcome will be. 😀 — Suzanne
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Well, you can be sure it’s a recipe for disaster. Instead of Dumb & Dumber, we’re … er,…never mind….
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All I can say is that the two of us were on a mission from GOTT!, and all of it went down exactly as Deadwoody has written except that “the band of elderly women wearing yoga pants” were actually a “band of eagerly women wearing no pants!” (Deadwoody tends to clean things up for our family audience.) The picture above of two old men is not really us either as we both look much younger in person.
http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/0/0d/Bluesbros.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20060222190930
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Thanks for clearing that up, Perry.
Obviously, we’re wearing make-up to achieve that old, senile look the producers insisted upon.
As for the women’s pants, my vision isn’t that good. It was hard to tell if that redhead was wearing leopard-print yoga pants, or if those were just age spots on her legs. Either way, it looked like she hadn’t shaved them since Marlon Brando was a teenager.
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What a riot! When is the movie going to be released?!
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The casting director is still searching for a horny male dog. You don’t know where he can find one, do you?
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I may play a dual role.
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Being chased by elderly ladies wearing yoga pants? That’s like being chased by the hounds of hell…which basically amounts to the same thing.
Very funny post and loving the new look.
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Fortunately, they couldn’t run very fast–the yoga pants didn’t help. Flake was rather attracted to the one who kept taking her dentures out and wolf-whistling at him.
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Hahaha! Sometimes you are so wrong on SO many levels. 🙂
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I think that comes as standard equipment in the male gender package.
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Enjoyed this piece of adventure and the comments as well 🙂
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Watch out for Perry in his dual role.
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Seems I got rave reviews as the dog. Not so much as the human.
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No one expected you to be able to raise your leg that high.
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Dear Deadwoody,
All I can say is Oy Gevalt! I can see where the American Pickers would want that Pacer. I can see you and Perry dancing the hora singing, “Lai, lai, lai lai, hava ne-Bagel mit a shmear, ain’t it dear, oy, yoy, yoy.”
Shalom,
Rukhel Schvester
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Dear Rukhel,
You have a very vivid imagination. In fact, dangerously vivid. Our dance routine could be referred to as Four Left Feet and our singing akin to squawking crows on cough syrup. I’m sure the video will go viral on YouTube.
Oy, yoy, yoy,
Deadwoody
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