How many of you are familiar with the radio spot, “Cars for the Blind?” In their ad, a spokesperson asks listeners to consider donating unwanted cars, trucks, buses, mini-vans, and stretch limousines to the blind. They’ll even take motorboats, yachts, and cruise ships if you happen to have one of those lying around.
Now, I’m not the kind of guy who discriminates against the disabled, but let me ask you, how many blind drivers do we really need on the highway? We’ve already got teenagers texting, ladies putting on mascara, and cops fantasizing about their next donut. It’s enough to make you want to have a few drinks before jumping into crosstown traffic.
If you are new to Friday Flash Fiction, our solicitor of 100 Word stories is Helen Keller Andretti Wisoff-Fields. To learn how to participate in this weekly exercise in madness, head over to her blog for instructions. To rent a box in the FFF Hollywood Squares Authors Block click here.
Photo copyright – Janet Webb
“Hey, Jill. Hold my beer while I try this.”
“No, Jack. Please. Remember what happened last time?”
“That was purely a fluke. It could happen to anyone.”
“What about the time before that, and the incident last week.”
“Just a little string of bad luck. Anyone could slip while carrying a pail of water. As I recall, you fell down also.”
“Only because you tripped me.”
“Are you saying I’m not agile?”
“It’s not your fault. You were born with two left feet.”
“Just hold the beer. I can do this.”
“Okay, but let me call the fire department first.”
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This is the blog of a woman who is seriously on the edge and I mean right ON the edge…no, not there… just a little bit further… further than that…no, further still…just a tiny bit more… just move slightly to the right a little…no, that’s too much…just move a tad to the left…that’s right, just there…now you’ve moved too far to the left… Damn, what part of the ‘on the edge’ do you not understand? Oh, and her matricidal boy genius, come devil spawn.
Or the three people I guilted into reading this blog, whatever.
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