How many of you remember sonic booms? If you do, all I’ve got to say is, “Damn, you’re old.”
I’m not sure what year they outlawed planes breaking the sound barrier (maybe one of our History Detectives will reveal the date in the comments section), but those earth-shattering explosions in the sky would rattle windows for miles around—much like a former co-worker of mine when he “broke wind.”
I’m not blaming my hearing loss on either of those events. A recent accident at the Ear, Nose, & Throat Clinic has left me with a hole in my right eardrum. Now, I’m the proverbial old man who’s blind in one ear and can’t see out of the other.
If you’re new to Friday Flash Fiction, the talented artist who can teach you to color outside the lines is Binney-Smith Wisoff-Fields. If you’d like to dip your toe in this brave new venture, visit her site and follow the step-by-step instructions. To view the kaleidoscope of writers in FFF Hollywood Squares Authors Block click here.
“Grandma, do you know what happened to my crayons?”
“Uncle Kent got an adult coloring book today. You should’ve seen him. He was so excited. He grabbed your crayons and ran outside.”
“I saw the book, but why did he—”
“You know, therapists say creating artwork can help adults explore their feelings, reconcile emotional conflicts, foster self-awareness, manage behavior and addictions, develop social skills, improve reality orientation, reduce anxiety and increase self-esteem.”
“When I see him, Uncle Kent’s gonna get a dose of reality orientation.”
“Why do you say that, Sweetheart?”
“He chewed the wrapper off every crayon.”
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This is the blog of a woman who is seriously on the edge and I mean right ON the edge…no, not there… just a little bit further… further than that…no, further still…just a tiny bit more… just move slightly to the right a little…no, that’s too much…just move a tad to the left…that’s right, just there…now you’ve moved too far to the left… Damn, what part of the ‘on the edge’ do you not understand? Oh, and her matricidal boy genius, come devil spawn.
Or the three people I guilted into reading this blog, whatever.
Growing older is inevitable. Growing up is optional.
I may make you feel, but I can't make you think.
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AS I TOLD THE GIRL THAT I LOST MY VIRGINITY TO, THANKS FOR LAUGHING AT ME HERE TODAY.
I don't write, I touch without touching.
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