Merry Christmas from Russell the Red-Nose Writer & Connie the Green-Thumb Gardener
Greetings Friends & Neighbors,
We’ve been blessed to survive another year (you probably figured that out when you got this card). Some of you may have suspected for years that Russell had mental issues. Well, now it’s official—he’s retared.
They say, “Ignorance is bliss,” and you’ll never meet a guy any happier to have this affliction.
Rather than bore you with the trivial events that occurred in our lives in 2017, we’ve decided to share some of the things that didn’t happen.
- We didn’t win the lottery (again)
- Russell’s book didn’t make the NY Times Best Seller List
- We didn’t secretly meet with Vladimir Putin
- No one offered to make a movie about us
- Neither of us aged a single day (wishful thinking)
Yet despite all these failures and shortcomings, we feel happy and blessed. The Lord has been good to us. Praise God.
It’s our sincere wish that each of you have Joyous Christmas and a Happy, Healthy, and Blessed New Year.
(his mark) (her mark)