Have you ever been watching TV or listening to the radio and decided to change channels when a commercial came on? If you’re like me, what you discovered is a hideous plot by advertisers to synchronize commercials. Somehow, they manage to successfully block every route of escape.
It doesn’t matter if you’re watching the news, sports, or Uncle Zeb’s Cartoon Camp, your program is going to be interrupted by someone pushing drugs or auto insurance. Punching the remote is a waste of time and thumb energy. I bet someone in the booth even calls down to the field, “Hey, Coach, have one of your players fake an injury—it’s time for a commercial break.”
While synchronized commercials do provide adequate time go to the bathroom, cook dinner, and wash your car, I still find them extremely aggravating. What pushes your buttons?
If you’re new to Friday Flash Fiction, the tiny fairy who sprinkles all the photo prompts with Purple Pixie Dust is Tinker Belle Merlot Wisoff-Fields. If you’d like to participate in this exercise in madness, head over to her blog for step-by-step instructions. To view the FFF Hollywood Squares Authors Block click here.
Hello. I’m Marty Woodchuck. You may remember my cousin, Gordon Dale Groundhog, who was brutally murdered a few years ago.
What you probably don’t know is why he was killed. In addition to being a top-notch weather forecaster, Gordon excelled at chucking wood. In fact, he was the odds-on favorite to win gold at the Wood Chucking Olympics.
Conspiracy theories abound as to who killed Gordon. Some blame the Chinese, others the Russians.
Today, prosecutors uncovered evidence linking Rowdy Beaver to the crime. Beaver, who was having an affair with Gordon’s wife, is said to be hiding in Montreal, Canada.
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This is the blog of a woman who is seriously on the edge and I mean right ON the edge…no, not there… just a little bit further… further than that…no, further still…just a tiny bit more… just move slightly to the right a little…no, that’s too much…just move a tad to the left…that’s right, just there…now you’ve moved too far to the left… Damn, what part of the ‘on the edge’ do you not understand? Oh, and her matricidal boy genius, come devil spawn.
Or the three people I guilted into reading this blog, whatever.
Growing older is inevitable. Growing up is optional.
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AS I TOLD THE GIRL THAT I LOST MY VIRGINITY TO, THANKS FOR LAUGHING AT ME HERE TODAY.
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